In my photography journey, I dabbled for a few years in family portraits in the New York area, and that experience has left a lasting impression.
First, mothers were always the heartbeat of these sessions. They book the appointments, prep their kids in matching or coordinated outfits, and bring them to the studio eagerly to ensure their kids’ lives are well documented in photos, documenting their growth and change. Yet, moma shows up in sweats—no intention of being in the photo.
Even when I suggested she come camera-ready beforehand, I learned that many hesitate to take a moment for themselves. This made me wonder why so many women sideline their legacy.
My Dance with Perfection
It took me until my mid-thirties to consider being professionally photographed. The occasion? I was celebrating my significant achievement of completing my undergraduate degree at Rutgers. I was on that slow path of day job meets night classes and weekend study life, which meant no life for a while.
I scheduled a two-hour photo shoot but spent three whole months preparing. Every detail—from diets to skincare—mattered because I was chasing this idea of “perfection.” I thought I couldn’t be immortalized in a professional photo without looking my best.
The day before the shoot, I added two hours to pick out the perfect outfits with rollers in my hair and a facemask on my face—you know, so my skin glistens with good health the next day. I got to bed early and—go figure—got absolutely no sleep because I had worked myself into an anxious ball.
Embracing Your Real Story
Here’s the epiphany: striving for perfection often means overlooking our authentic selves. Looking back, I completely lost focus on my original intention—celebrating my milestone. In hindsight, I could’ve prepared for my shoot within a couple of hours.
Did I need perfectly primped eyebrows? No. Did I need to lose weight? No.
Those little quirks and imperfections were pieces of my unique story back then. They were as perfect as life could get. Had I embraced my story at the time instead of getting fixated on perfection, I would have enjoyed my session and my photos more (and myself).
Self-Celebration & Legacy Matters
During that intense prep for my shoot, I realized it wasn’t really about capturing the perfect version of me. It was about embracing who I was at that moment. That photoshoot taught me so much that it was a massive part of my self-growth journey. I now focus on the big picture, not immaterial details. I learned self-acceptance and celebration.
Today, I view my photos not from a critical standpoint but from a love for the woman who has endured so much. That was me, and I graduated college…I loved Jennifer Aniston, as you can tell from my hairstyle….and it goes on.
I also realized the importance of having tangible photos of myself. I go back to them to remember the woman I once was. And I know those portraits will become part of my legacy so my great-nieces can know me long after I’m gone.
Step Up to the Lens in Your Family Portraits
Even if being in front of the camera isn’t your favorite thing, it’s important to step up for your kids. As they grow, those images become treasures, rich with proof that you were there—living, loving, and triumphing over challenges.
At the very least, make sure you’re in those family portraits. You are, without a doubt, the most important person in your child’s life. Be in the portrait, momma. Your presence in these moments is a powerful reminder that you’re always there for them.
Go Beyond Family Portraits & Capture Your Story
On a deeper level, consider having your portraits taken. These images tell the story of a vibrant, multifaceted woman. They capture your essence, your journey, and your strength. It’s about more than just a picture—it’s a way to embrace self-love and acceptance.
Think of it as a personal growth journey. Just like I did, you’ll find it’s a decision you won’t regret. Taking the time to see yourself through the lens can be transformative, helping you to appreciate all that you are and all that you’ve overcome. So go ahead, step into the frame, and celebrate yourself as the incredible woman you are.
Comments are closed